It is claimed that in the Bible there are multiple words for ‘love’ in the Greek and that the English doesn’t distinguish between them as well as Greek does (despite English also having multiple words for love). The claim is that agape is DEEP love and phileo is CASUAL love. John 21 (“lovest thou me … feed my sheep”) is upheld as the primary example. Let’s see how that pans out by taking this simple test. Guess which Greek word for ‘love’ (?) is the correct one and we’ll see if that difference holds up:
1. Peter . . .seeth the disciple whom Jesus loved (?) John 21:20 (19:26; 21:7)
2. the other disciple, whom Jesus loved (?) John 20:2
3. For whom the Lord loveth (?) he chasteneth. Heb 12:6
4. As many as I love (?), I rebuke and chasten Rev 3:19
5. ye love (?) the uppermost seats in the synagogues ... Luke 11:43
6. love (?) greetings in the markets, and the highest seats in the synagogues Luke 20:46
7. the Father himself loveth (?) you, because ye have loved (?) me. John 16:27
8. If any man love (?) not the Lord Jesus Christ, let him be Anathema. 1 Cor 16:22
9. For the Father loveth (?) the Son. John 5:20
10. Greet them that love (?) us in the faith. Titus 3:15
11. ... ye yourselves are taught of God to love (?) one another. 1 Th 4:9
12. unto unfeigned love of the brethren see that ye love (?) one another." 1 Pet 1:22
13. He that loveth (?) father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: ... Matt 10:37
14. But God commendeth his love (?) toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Rom 5:8
15. That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love (?) their husbands, to love their children, Titus 2:4
16. So ought men to love (?) their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. Eph 5:28
Here are the correct answers: 1. A 2. P 3. A 4. P 5. A 6. P 7. P 8. P 9. P 10. P 11. A 12. A 13. P 14. P 15. P 16. A
That leaves us with some interesting results:
1&2 Did Jesus have a deep love for His disciples or a casual love?
2&3 Does the Lord chasten those He loves deeply or casually?
5&6 Do they love greetings deeply or casually?
7&8 Are we supposed to love the Lord deeply or casually?
9. Wait, the Father only loves the Son CASUALLY?
10&11&12 Do we have to love the brethren casually or deeply?
13. We only have to love our parents CASUALLY?
14. God only loves us CASUALLY?!?!?
15. Wives only have to love their husbands CASUALLY.
16. Husbands have to love their wives deeply.
As you can see, the agape/phileo distinction does not hold. In fact, it creates a lot of nonsense. The CONTEXT determines what type or degree of love is being spoken of, not some false Greek “nugget”.
John 21:15-17 So when they had dined, Jesus saith to Simon Peter, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me more than these? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my lambs. He saith to him again the second time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my sheep. He saith unto him the third time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? Peter was grieved because he said unto him the third time, Lovest thou me? And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee. Jesus saith unto him, Feed my sheep.
If Jesus said something to Peter a SECOND time and a THIRD time, that means each time Jesus was saying the SAME THING.